Unfaithful

Sometime ago my friend found out her husband is cheating on her. A little affair that broke the ice palace they were building together for more than 15 years. Sometimes it is a matter of something missing, sometimes the fire in the heart vanishes. There is no rule why love disappears but every time it is very painful.

There is this theory about love and true love. At first we simple fall in love. This is probably the most passionate part of the relationship, especially for those who never moved to the next phase. At this point our soul and heart is singing along with Orange Blue that She's got that light or with Whitney Houston we promise each other that We will always love... 

Some couples stays in this phase for years, playing with each other and discovering every other day as the new one. Most of them, however, move to breaking up shortly. It takes days, weeks, sometimes even years, but finally it is over and we turn to another man or woman searching for better one. There are many songs that shows it with beautiful cruelty and I will have a lot more chances to show you some of them in the future. What has to be said is that there are always two sides. One that make a move and another with broken heart. There are plenty of reasons, but we forget them as soon as we find another love object.

The second stage is more demanding than it seems. It is getting used to each other in more then one way. It is not easy to say when couple reaches this phase. Is it just after marriage or before or maybe in 3 week time? Personally, I think it might come when you are so used to your partner that you cannot imagine life without him or her. It is not the issue of being passionate, it is rather prosaic. Who will wash your clothes, clean bathroom, buy movies for the night, who will kiss you in the morning and how much you miss those little things when you are away.
I believe it is the best phase to stay in your relationship as long as you remember how it is in the first one and you know how to benefit from both phases. Make sure that your partner feels your love as when you meet rather than make him/her feel like a piece of furniture in your life. Loving is about showing your attraction care and most of it trust.

What happens with all those couples that reached second phase and got broken anyway? They simply get used to eachother too much and one of partners wants more. Sometimes both of them. They get bored with each other. There is no way to surprise your partner since he or she knows you better than you do. At least that is what they say. The truth is totally different...
It is more like a baby and a toy. We play, have fun and we get bored. We forget how much fun there can be in playing. We look at all those beautiful couples that just met and cannot stop touching, kissing and so on. We want to feel it again, but it is hard when your partner changed. Gained or lost some pounds, skin got darker, he or she has no time or desire to play. We know we have our second half of orange but still... it is not sweet enough.

Is it really so hard to see that we are loved? Is it so hard to love back like we once did?

I will write about third phase tomorrow, so come back if you dare :)